Overheard on the 4 Westbound

“Bitch took my smokes last night.”

“Really? What a cow.”

“Yeah, no shit. ‘Course that don’t matter ‘cause I stole her car last week.”

“When did your car die?”

“Last week, plucked and fucked. Tie rods shot, needs a new water pump. Cocksucker.”

“My uncle fixes shit. Maybe he could take a look at it.”

“Maybe…”

“Wanna drink tonight?”

“Only if you’re payin’, douchebag.”

“I paid last time, bitch.”

“Kidding, llama face.”

“Llama face? What the hell?”

“Yeah, you know, face like a fucking pack animal.”

“Dude, you’re fucking weird.”

“Hey, I ain’t the one tryin’ to skip out on buyin’ the booze.”

“I ain’t buyin’ this time.”

“I’ll buy. Dozen?”

“Make it 18. Long week.”

“Smokes. We need smokes. Grab some smokes, too. Pay you back later.”

“Whatever.”